Shadow Queen Read online

  My heart jumped. He could be right. But I knew this was what I needed to focus on, not my own personal wants. Needs!

  “Not yet, Cas. Not yet.”

  His eyes closed as he laid his palms flat across the door. His left hand searching for the doorknob he whispered, “I will be back in five, no ten minutes. Be in the bed. You’ re not staying alone tonight.”

  He was gone before I could protest even though I wasn’t planning on it in the first place.

  CHAPTER NINE

  …the sun, the moon, and the truth.

  Everyone texted each other the next morning. There was a general feeling of ease, but something hid in the shadows of my being. I didn’t feel like we’d just conquered the enemy and wrapped up the sordid ordeal. We had Borgon and Nara locked up and the Godslayer well hidden within the Vampire court archives I learned about.

  When Cas returned to sleep last night being totally exhausted like myself and frustrated at my refusal, he told me about the vaulted archives for the court. I would be the first outsider to be privy to the information it seemed. I listened with interest and felt privileged that he told me, but I found it hard to believe others, (other factions) don’t know about all of these secrets. I mean, Lee stayed in my family’s court for years. He knew our secrets. Others had spies as well. I had a hard time believing others weren’t enlightened on all tidbits of information.

  Regardless of my thoughts, we all agreed to meet up the next day outside of our usual settings. We headed to town going back to a place we’ve been before. Humans inhabited it and never knew who was among them, but I consented because I knew the jukebox would have the happy notes of music from Pat Benatar that I loved.

  The lunchtime crowd was winding down with only a few tables left full. Calum, the huge giant of a Hunter, pretty much squeezed himself into the booth. His knees knocked against mine more than once under the table. I knew it wasn’t on purpose, (I think) on account of he’d grown since we’d been here last. I made him bring Maze because she was with us last time.

  I also made the poor mistake of mentioning again that he was twice the size but didn’t mean anything inappropriate by it, but of course, men are a different species altogether. They think with the other parts of their body more often than not.

  After I stayed away from anything having to do with size, I focused on my music. We all took turns picking a song, sometimes opting for different artists and types of music. I felt traitorous to Pat B., but music defined me in so many ways, so I didn’t argue. We ended with a resounding “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” to commemorate the day before. We all laughed and filed out of the booth.

  Cas paid for the two of us, no one else. That was kind of funny to me only because our dating wasn't anything like the movies said it would be. We turned to snake back through the restaurant towards the exit that shared an entrance sign just as Calum bungled up to us with, “You guys seen Cord and Szar?”

  I shrugged acting like I didn’t care but noting that his voice seemed a profoundly deeper thaneven yesterday in addition to the bulk. In fact, I think he was taller even. Bigger. Huge.

  “Probably taking a piss.”

  I snapped up to Calum knowing then he was in fact...hunkier. And when had I become the mother of this crew? I sure wasn’t the poster girl for keeping my language on the down low, but manners already.

  Calum laughed at my librarian glare and wandered off to the restrooms mumbling stupid stuff I didn’t want to hear. Then...I heard the crack. I rushed out the front doors seeing what amounted to the middle of a parking lot brawl betwixt my brother and Cord. Since this little restaurant included humans too, I vastly worried this would turn into something I might have to get my father or Cas to cover up.

  I neared Szar first hoping maybe I could coax him down with insults or whatever words would stop him from the adrenaline swing that was already midair.

  Cord’s bloody mouthed expression twisted like his body with stone cold rage. He braced for the now unavoidable blow that was nearing his jaw because of my distraction. From Szar’s back, one could tell he had the skill of a quick easy Spartan like attack. Cord inherited, or developed, a taste for the swing and miss blocking techniques using very little effort.

  I shouted both their names to no avail. Finally, at my wits end, I grabbed the first arm I came too and yanked. Twisted to the side, but still being held, I blacked out. What happened next was a slice in time I’d never forget.

  It was Cord’s arm I had in my grasp and he saw exactly what I did. The kind of blacking out associated with Cord wasn’t the fainting kind. The fortune-telling kind. We both saw...a burial.

  As soon as it hit, it popped away like a firecracker lighting beside me. My other arm was hurting now. I looked over as my eyes closed in midfall and saw Szar releasing my other arm like I burned him.

  Cord fell with me. Tangled on the concrete, we both raised our eyes at exactly the same time and dropped our mouths to precisely the same diameter.

  Cas rushed me upward taking my arms away from Cord’s embrace that never fully formed. “What did you see, Anastacia?”

  My vision blurred for some reason as I stumbled in his arms. Him saying my name was all I could focus on. I told myself he meant business if my whole name was said. He’d said it a lot yesterday just to get to me. I blinked and looked up.

  Cord rushed the car, making a dent in the fender with his boot. He got angry after the encounter, I fell over.

  “Someone dead. I mean their funeral. But….” I searched for Cord to finish my thought. It was Lee. He was dead.

  “I don’t know exactly. That was only the third vision, but felt like it was stopped or something. Like something cut if off.” His face watched my own for confirmation. I managed a nod to make sure he knew I felt the same.

  Cord, still shaking his head out like he had a massive headache like my own, mumbled, “It was like someone stopped it this time before we could finish.”

  All eyes went to my brother.

  “What the jeebs, folks.” He threw his hands up. “I didn’t do jack.”

  “We’re doing it again. Hang on.” Before anyone could reject the idea I grabbed Cord’s face where his busted lip was already healing and dug my fingernails in tight. I just heard a scream of protest when I blacked out. In the seconds it happened, I saw Lee’s face in a combined link with the Elf Lord’s face from the day Cas was taken prisoner in the downtown hell hole of a building they called the shack imaged together like some kind of Sci-fi movie trick.

  And then it was gone.

  Szar was slapping my face and Cord’s simultaneously. I yelled something unladylike at him.

  “What? You didn’t exactly give me time to digest your implications nor warn me what you wanted me to do. I improvised.” Szar grinned proud of his wit. "By the way, your goddess cooties hurt. I don't want to do that again."

  “Fine.” Then I realized what he said. "Why."

  He spit on the ground, "You two zapped me with some kind of ray gun jelly roll. It hurt."

  I just didn't get him sometimes. It had to be the shield from his letter. He could stop us like we could start it. It meant something, but what?

  Cas spoke softly checking my cheek for marks and giving a death glare to my brother, “What did you see?”

  Cord’s eyes lifted conspiratorially to mine as if we had mind connections I wasn’t aware of. After a long staring contest I started, letting him finish. “Lee’s face...”

  “...in 3-d with Borgon.”

  Yep! He saw the same. It was all still creepy to me.

  “So Szar’s not left out of this little band. He can stop you two,” Calum suggested.

  I had an idea. “What if...Calum come grab me.” I didn’t have time for male antics so I ignored their looks, especially Cas’. “Szar, I’m going to connect with Calum. Give it a few seconds before you take hold of my arm, no slapping, and don’t let go. Got it.”

  “Got it sis, though I can’t be blamed for my apparent superpo
wer abilities if they reach outside your specifications.” I sneered my lip up at him. “Better perfect that lip jive thing. Kind of creepy looking to think my man kisses that mouth, but I wouldn’t want spit drooling out because of your deformities.”

  “Lovely, brother. You’re so romantically driven. Bet all the ladies fall over...DEAD...at your sentiments.”

  “Oh, they fall over, just not in the way I’ll discuss with my sister.”

  “Yuck, Szar. Can we get on with this?”

  Calum might have laughed at our sibling rivalry, but he silenced when I neared. Almost shaking, he reached out his gigantic hand to my arm that could very well wrap around me twice and then some. He wasn’t angry so it wasn’t a power surge or anything, just the slow buzzing hum of light pain. The seconds passed and it all subsided when Szar palmed my shoulder. I was right. I was freaking right. Szar’s an instant off screen and it went into play and stopped any amount of whatever you could call our little talents. Magic, I guess.

  “Alright. Might as well try it all. Cas, start talking.” I smiled so large at our discoveries I was almost floating like a Vampire.

  Kissa, this is just weird.

  I know, but we have to know.

  I don’t like the idea of being cut off fro—

  And there it was. Szar’s hand was back on my arm signaling our connection lost. I wouldn’t call it screening necessarily, but it was instantly off the second he touched me.

  Cas yanked Szar’s hand off his own, “Hands off, man. I’m not part of it. And it doesn’t happen unless I give the say.”

  “Cas, it’s meant to help us.”

  His face drew in, “How would cutting me off help anything? Forget it. I refuse to be cut off from you. Nothing good could come from it.”

  “Except you telling dirty stuff in her head,” Calum chuckled.

  Cord laughed out, “Yeah. Who knows what you two are really saying. Oh Thorn, I need you now.” His voice grew deeper again, “Oh Stace, your so hot I can’t stand up straight.”

  I plowed both of them with a fist to the gut. They both yowled at me and headed to their cars.

  “Either way,” Szar yelled over the top of his hood, “it’s something else. Let’s meet at the warehouse tomorrow and discuss with real weapons in our hands. I need to go home and wash off the sisterly “cooties” before my date tonight. I need to forget this hour of power ever happened. Peace out.”

  He was in the car and gone before anyone else. Calum was easy going today, but his hesitancy in getting in the car was caught by not just me. I smiled at him to ease it out of him, but Cas cleared his throat and told me to get in the car. He said something over the roar of the engine to Calum, but I couldn’t hear it. Calum’s face crunched to mere lethal, but he let it all disappear when he looked through the window to me. I watched him drive off.

  In the Hummer, I asked him what he said to make him so angry.

  “Nothing noteworthy.”

  “Cas,” I warned.

  “I told him to get a clue, Anastacia. You’re mine.”

  Aware. Agreed.

  CHAPTER TEN

  No one saves us but ourselves...

  Calum went the extra mile to show off his new Hunter strength and bulk. Maze was with us and noted it in rather embarrassing detail. Luckily it was hidden from his ears, but not Cas’. He grunted and growled internally at every vivid body part Maze marveled over. I asked her to stop, but that seemed to make her talk more.

  So when Maze confronted Calum about his growing size just as I had on occasion, all heck broke out of Cas. He was even larger than six days ago, much less six months ago. Maze suggested making him stand still and pulled out a measuring tape, so he went with it just to peeve Cas off. The guy was officially six foot seven. Is that normal?

  Szar shot off with, “I think the girls are saying our man Calum here is more the alpha male type than Cord.”

  Cord said his usual sailor like words and walked away just as broody as ever. Would there ever be a moment of unparalleled testosterone induced males constantly trying to show each other up? Not when you’re outnumbered. And not that I was fully complaining now that I had another female around to handle it with me.

  I forced Cord to sit at the table with a water bottle and chat with me about the visions. I wanted to catalogue them, but he wasn’t up for it, he said. The visions help to see what is ahead but with me, he said, can also make his enhightened sense of a Werewolf stronger for a time afterwards. I asked him what he meant and he gave a hurried look around the room with a strong shake of his head. “Not here.”

  Okay. I wasn’t sure being alone with him would be good either, but I didn’t argue. For now.

  I returned with Maze to the Hunter school to grab my sword from the gym. The one Calum said I could have. Cas wasn't happy and protested the gesture at first, but relinquished after I told him the comfort of it. He misinterpreted my meaning, and once again starting protesting, but I finally got through with explaining the hilt. The weight of the sword was proportioned to my own weight better than any I'd ever held. Of course, Calum's self-satisfied look of semi-ownership didn't help my cause, but it is what it is.

  I spent the day with her surrounded by girls relishing in the lack of male forms. Sure enough, I ran into Calum leaving the gym whom must of followed us. He started in about Cas again hating the sword he'd never seen taking the standpoint of his disapproval being just about the sword. He knew better, but I didn't push the envelope further.

  “After everything you’ve been through this year, your still bound and determined that he is the one for you.”

  Calum got the A+ for persistence. “Yes, Calum. I love him. That won’t change.”

  His face shriveled up. I looked away to the beloved trees towering above us, unwilling to continue a conversation I wanted to just go away. I thought he’d come to terms with this.

  “You’re not the person you used to be. You won’t have to change to be with me. I love that girl who uses sarcasm to tell me like it is when I need to be put in my place.”

  It wasn’t like that with Cas, I know. But it’s not the same. Like the old cliche, he makes me weak in the knees. I can’t get a word in when he’s so close, smells so good, and looking at me with those eyes. I looked at Calum whom was watching me expectedly. His eyes were warm and safe. Oh, Calum was pure gorgeousness, but in a playful way.

  Desire lit up in his eyes still reading my emotionally blank face. He tucked a hair behind my ear that wasn’t there. This wasn’t his style. He wasn’t this touchy feely. He was just trying to invent what he thinks he wants. What I want.

  Just when I was about to set him straight he continued with, “You won’t have to pretend with me. I know your thoughts too.”

  That’s it. “Calum, this isn’t about knowing my thoughts or knowing what I want. And I’m not going into why your mind created that I am pretending to be who I am. You knew me for only a few months. That doesn’t constitute really knowing me. I am who I am and you just need to accept that and move on. I am not trying to hurt you, but you really need to try being my friend. I need you as a friend.”

  His frown deepened and moved downward with his shoulders. “I do know you. That day in class, the first. The day you held the only weapon I could beat you at. You let me see a side of you no one else knows. You may not have known it then, but I did. Like a brick to the head, I knew you were meant for me, Stace. You can’t deny the night you kissed me when I found you were marked like me. Don’t deny you felt it too.”

  The same expectant looked appeared as hope in his eyes.

  “I don’t deny that night will forever be edged into my existence as the single most reassuring and defining moment that changed the course of my history. I won’t even deny that I was totally googly eyed by your kiss or even your protective alphaness when Quinn invaded, but it wasn’t meant to be. I can’t explain it anymore than that. I was safe with you, cared for. It’s just not the same.”

  “So you don’t find
me attractive?”

  Lord, he was acting like he was driven by estrogen. He needed to get his head on straight.

  “Calum, you know very well that every Hunter girl at this school falls over their feet to see you lean a smile in their direction. This is not about how hot you are. That doesn’t make someone any more or any less desirable. I believe there is a soul mate for everyone because I found mine. Attraction is only the smallest part of when it happens to you. It may be the initiating factor, but it isn’t what seals you to them. There is a deep, sad part of you that opens showing what you are all about inside and out. First, you are afraid. Then, that fear and sadness gets pushed out by an overwhelming urge to give everything of yourself. Yet, you still hold back. At some point, you come to reality and it hits you who you’re with. It’s the one you’ve been waiting for. The one who can break you into a thousand pieces with one look. One word. One action. Cas can destroy me if he really wanted to.”

  I didn’t even know I’d gone on and on. I felt stupid pouring my heart out like so but it was the truth.

  “I—I really don’t know what to say to all that.” Calum ran his fingers through his hair. “You are really, really into him.”

  I guess my loaded speech was successful rather than painfully embarrassing as I felt. I wanted to leave now.

  “I am still not willing to give up, but I can see that you believe what you say. I won’t deny that I wish you were referring to me, but I will refrain from making you uncomfortable about it anymore.” His feet turned towards the woods. Yeah, he’d said that before.

  “Just so you know, he said the same.”

  “What?” My mind and body stood to attention not only to his comment but to another presence nearby. Cas was coming closer than he already was.

  Calum laughed low pulling my mind back to him. “You see the way you react to just hearing something about him. Don’t think I didn’t notice before, I just didn’t want to admit it.” Calum shifted his body and watched his shoes draw circles in the dirt.